Day by Day, Walk this Way

The other day I was a little frustrated because the "organized" me wanted to be able to--"almost"--put it in my planner that I would walk at 7:30 am. I say "almost" because I don't think I would REALLY write in my planner that I will walk exactly at a precise time every day. I am four years retired, though, and still live by my planner. So it's not completely unthinkable that I could start writing it in as a daily thing at a specific time.

I'm not writing it in my planner, ok? It's a habit now, anyway. 

Seems really silly now, but earlier this week, we had rain in the forecast yet again. This is a weird summer; the rain is usually gone by July, not that I'm complaining about the rain, because I'm not! I LOVE rain. (Read my blog post "The Puddles are Dancing" to learn why). However, it was messing with the daily walk I have become accustomed to. Rain in the morning meant I couldn't walk until evening, because the window is before 9am or after 7pm. All times in between those hours are unbearably hot and humid.

So I was praying about it on my way to the campus where the walking paths are. "I can't find one specific time to always have my walk," I complained. "Every day when I get up I have to check the weather to see if I will be walking as soon as I can get dressed and out the door or am I waiting until after 7pm."

"Or if it's good in the morning, but rainy that night, that day I will walk in the morning, but the next day, it might be just before sunset. It's so frustrating! I'm committed to walking daily, but it's a day-to-day process!"

Then in my spirit I heard "Kind of like trusting the Lord for your daily needs?"

Yes. It's exactly like that. I am daily depending on God's grace to be sufficient for that day. It ALWAYS IS, but it doesn't always come in the way I thought or at the exact time I was expecting. That's how it is. He promised to provide my needs, but He didn't give me a typed itinerary of how and what He would provide.

I know it's not for everyone, but I have found a new enjoyment in a daily walk. Somehow, I daily have the desire to go and the stamina to do it. I have actually walked inside Walmart during the spring when it rained just about every day. I feel like joy it brings me and the ability to do this is a gift from God. Otherwise, I would have already quit. I have tried many times before in my 70 years. It never became a habit, I never liked it, and after a few weeks I had quit because it was too hard.

A couple of days ago I reposted something I had posted years ago: 

"I will bless the Lord at all times; His praise shall continually be in my mouth." Psalm 34:1. 

It's still true today. I may wake up, check the weather app, and see that I can walk in the morning; or I may find that I will have to wait until evening. Possibly, I might even be walking at Walmart. It doesn't matter. He will work it out in His way. 

And I will still bless the name of the Lord. ALWAYS. 

Be blessed, my friends! 

The view above in the forest

The blessed shade!

It's all downhill from here!

Summer Stuff and Some Encouragement

A little over a week ago we had the summer solstice on June 21. This was the longest day of the year; now the days are getting shorter in the northern hemisphere where I live. Onward toward fall! I've included a picture of the sun peeking up over the trees in my backyard, taken that Saturday morning about 7:30. That's the farthest northeast it will rise for a good while. 

We've already established that I'm a nerd about these things. On to other things.

The week of June 15th was unbearably hot, getting to the low 90s in the afternoon. I walked mornings when I could, but even then it was in the low 80s. I've included some pictures of the campus, up by the buildings, and the more wooded trail at ASU, which was a little cooler on those days because it was shadier.

Last week we started having more rain again, so at least it cooled off some. I had to walk at Cooper Park several days because they were getting the ASU campus ready for the annual Red, White, and Blue celebration, held on June 28 and 29. I really missed my familiar trails, but it was good to have somewhere else to walk. 

We had a fireworks display Saturday night, and it was magnificent as usual. Pictures don't do it justice, but I will include some. (All the rest of the pictures will be at the end).

I have pretty much finished the front "porch" refresh. I will eventually buy an outdoor rug, and I am considering painting the front door, but for now I'm content with what it is. It's the best I can do right now, considering it's a rental. I like it. I feel like I'm sitting in a little garden when I am having my morning coffee. I especially like the blue wind chimes with the copper bells.

I'll leave you with some encouragement.

I'm still reading the Bible Recap reading plan for the year, and the passage in yesterday's reading is one of my favorites. In 2 Chronicles 20, where 3 surrounding enemy countries were coming against Judah and King Jehoshaphat, the Spirit of the Lord spoke through Jahaziel and told the king and all the people that this battle was not theirs, but God's. He told them to simply stand and watch the way the Lord came to their rescue. 

They watched as all their enemies turned on each other, and their enemies all killed each other. Every one of their enemies was dead, and it took them 3 days to carry the spoils of war back home.

This is really encouraging to me. Not only did God destroy their enemies, He did it knowing that Jehoshaphat would make a wicked alliance in the future that would displease Him. 

It's so hard to get my head around the love of God. He is kind and good to us even when we aren't. We certainly don't deserve how good He is to His children. We can never earn His love. 

Read 2 Chronicles 20 and the following chapter or 2. It's an amazing account.

Blessings to you all! 

"'You need not fight in this battle; station yourselves, stand and see the salvation of the Lord on your behalf, O Judah and Jerusalem.' Do not fear or be dismayed; tomorrow go out to face them, for the Lord is with you."

2 Chronicles 20:17 NASB

Looking Up When Down

I try to be positive online, but it's not been easy lately. Life can sometimes get you down in spite of your best intentions to rise above it. I was really down this afternoon when I went for my daily walk on the ASU campus trails. I love walking there. I was hoping that some exercise and sunshine would lift my mood.

Sometimes to be an encourager, I have found I have to share little, seemingly trivial things along the way. I have to look for the good, the glimpses of God at work to boost my dark mood. In sharing how I have found light in the low places, it is my hope that someone will read this and be uplifted.

I can't elaborate, but currently there are things out of my control that have me upset. On my walk, I listened to an encouraging podcast by a Christian author, and I kept walking after it was over, praying about the issue that has me down.

It's not solved yet, but I have no doubt that God will work it all out. He always has my back. He doesn't always act as quickly as I would like, and sometimes the answer is different than expected, but He will take care of me; I am sure of it.

Meanwhile, I did find some things on my walk to be happy about. 

First, the scenery was beautiful. Not only the trees and landscaping, but there are art sculptures along the trail.  The sun was peeking through the clouds, and for some reason I found this encouraging. I've added some photos of these.

Secondly, I also enjoyed that the creek was merrily running along, vibrant and full from the recent rains we have had. Something about the sight and sound of a babbling brook is so therapeutic to me.

Finally, on my way back to the car, after I had turned around (because I still haven't gone to the end of the art trail. I'm thinking it's maybe at least 2 miles one way?) I was passing a couple with the most adorable puppy. He looked kind of like a cocker spaniel. He was so cute! I actually asked to pet him, which they agreed to, and he was very happy about that. This little dog, probably under a year old, was so sweet and friendly. It made me smile in spite of my troubles.

Bonus: I walked 1.71 miles, and I realized as I neared the car that my back didn't hurt! Usually when I have attempted to walk more than 1.25 miles, I start having spasms in my mid-back and have to sit down. This didn't happen on this walk!

God has my situation. I know He will take care of me. And He gave me some things to smile about as I walked along talking to Him about it all.

"Blessed be the Lord, Because He has heard the sound of my pleading. The Lord is my strength and my shield; 
My heart trusts in Him, and I am helped; 
Therefore, my heart triumphs, And with my song I shall thank Him."

Psalm 28:6-7

From the Porch: Why is the Tree There?

Rain kept me inside all last week, but I've been able to get to the porch

for my morning coffee and prayer time for most of this week. Sitting out there, I noticed something.

All the other condos in my neighborhood have very similar landscaping. We all have hedges by the front entrance and some other shrubs that are almost cookie-cutter identical. 

My front area, however, has a cedar tree by the driveway instead of a round shrub. As I sat there a few mornings ago, I was pondering why this is. 

I'm not a fan of bright sunlit rooms in my house. I know that's not typical. I like more of a warm, softly lit vibe. Bright sun hurts my eyes; I'm just very sensitive to bright sunlight. I almost always wear sunglasses on the rare occasion that I am outside on a bright day.

This cedar tree shades my living room perfectly. From afternoon through early evening in the warmer months, the sun hits my house increasingly toward the southwest as the summer wears on. Together with the window treatments and mini-blinds, my living room has a bearable level of afternoon sunlight, filtered so well by the tree.

Some would say I was lucky to get the house with the tree when I was looking for a place to rent. I feel like it's more than that, though. I think God had this place in mind for me long ago, when the tree was just a sapling. 

Laugh if you think it silly. I don't mind. I'm sure lots of people laugh when they read my blog. I'm not sharing content that I think will draw people in. I'm just sharing my heart. I know my God orders my steps. Why wouldn't He give me a tree to shade me from the harsh late afternoon sun? 

One more thing. It's a cedar tree; an evergreen. It's green year round, just like God's love is everlasting. 

I'm counting it as one of my blessings. I thank God for the tree that gives me shade.

Be blessed, my friends!

 "I will exalt You, my God, the King,
And I will bless Your name forever and ever.
2 Every day I will bless You,
And I will praise Your name forever and ever.
3 Great is the Lord, and highly to be praised;
And His greatness is unsearchable." Psalm 145:1-3 NASB

From the Porch: Reflections on Bearing Fruit

Those of you who have read my blog for a while may have noticed I hardly ever post "from the patio" anymore. It has become more difficult to beat the sun out there in my east-facing back yard, since in my retirement I hardly get up before 8:00 unless I have an appointment. That's the main reason, and we'll leave it at that. 

So I now have a comfortable, shady little nook by my west-facing front door that is so good, thanks to some chairs I acquired a few weeks ago. It's not really a porch, but we're going to call it that.

Ah, it's good to be back. I didn't realize how much I had missed being outside with the breeze, the birds singing, and the beauty of God's creation.

Recently, as I sat on the front porch in my new plastic chair, I noticed that the petunia in my tiny little garden area is struggling, yet it has managed to bloom anyway. Even though the heavy rains in early August nearly drowned it and the extreme heat that followed the rains threatened to burn it up, still it managed to bloom. 

This caused me to reflect for a moment. When it would appear outwardly that it had become useless and needed to be discarded, it still did what God created it to do: bloom. In doing so, it was providing nectar for bees and beauty for all to see and enjoy.

I meditated on this thought for a while, as I sat outside enjoying nature during my morning prayer and devotions for the first time in many weeks. 

I believe we humans are not entirely dissimilar to my poor little plant. We have storms in life that threaten to destroy us. Sometimes we undergo sickness and pain and we feel we will surely not survive the heat of the trials we are suffering through. Yet we "soldier on" as the British say. 

As long as we have food, water, and health, we remain alive, though age and years of abuse from various types of adversity render us into an older and less than stable-looking version of ourselves. We look in the mirror and scarcely recognize the older, more "mature" face that stares back at us.

Yet if we submit to the hand of the Master Gardener, our Lord Jesus, we can still produce fruit in our lives. Even if we don't think we appear as appealing on the outside as we once did, (this is very subjective, and we are usually more critical of ourselves than others are), we still can do what God has enables us to do, fulfilling our destiny as Christians.

This is the desire of my heart; to be fruitful and useful for all the days God gives me.

Just a few thoughts from the perspective of a retired, "mature" (in age, anyway) woman.

Be blessed, my friends.

"I am the vine, you are the branches; the one who remains in Me, and I in him bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing." John 15:5 NASB

Christmas in the Hometown

I went back to my hometown for a Christmas visit last week, but I'm just now posting about it.

It was a good visit; I saw friends and family (sorry, didn't get pictures of everyone I got to see) and visited places in town that are new to me (since I haven't lived there in over 2 years). My oldest son flew in from Atlanta, so we got to hang out for a couple of days.

Interesting perspective: My children visited me lots of times in the many years I lived in Van Buren; I would take them to see new things and they would comment on how much their hometown was changing. Well...this time, my son and I were BOTH seeing our hometown as visitors who hadn't lived there in a while. We were amazed and delighted by visiting some things that hadn't changed, such as Paul's Bakery, Pizza Parlour, and Braums. Thank God those places are there! Neither of us have anything as good or nostalgic in our current homes. (Ok, it's not all about food, but we still have to partake of their goodness when we visit! IYKYK!)

We were also amazed and excited to see things that are different, like Arts on Main, which is delightful, and the beautiful downtown area that is vibrant with glorious color and is so alive with the community gathering there.

Also, finally a Chick-fil-A is coming! About time! Although, the traffic is already terrible in that area. I hope someone can engineer a solution to the traffic problem.

We drove through the City Park one night to see the lights there. It's so fun to see what they have done there; they have added some since last year I believe. We forgot to take pictures of them, though.

We also visited Creekmore Park in Fort Smith. Some of the pictures are from there. The line was extremely long, so we didn't ride the train. We just walked around the walking path.

Saturday night, after Jeremy had to go catch a plane, I watched the Christmas Parade. I thought I was videoing the very awesome VBHS marching band but found that I wasn’t! I hadn't pushed the record button apparently. I almost cried about that. They were magnificent.

So there aren’t many pictures of the parade because I was heartbroken I hadn’t captured the band’s performance.

I also walked around and took some pictures of the area close to the depot where the skating rink and tree are (can’t remember what it’s called). I hadn’t taken pictures of it lit up when Jeremy and I had seen it earlier that evening.

It was a great trip, and I'm pleased that my hometown is doing so well. I miss living there, and I miss lots of people there, but I'm so glad to be living where I am now, 10 minutes from my daughter, son-in-law, and grandkids. I'm also gaining new friends and have a new church family here. I'm so blessed.

I hope you all have some wonderful experiences this Christmas season, and that you remember that Jesus is the reason for the season.

Merry Christmas to all my friends and family! ❤️🎄❤️🎄❤️

Late Summer Post from the Patio

I haven't been sitting on my patio for a while now. As you may recall if you've read my blog posts often, my east-facing backyard patio is too bright and usually too hot by the time I'm up and have taken my meds and made my coffee. 

Most days, I'm up by 8:00 or so (retirement perk!), but since the sun gets up much earlier than that, I end up taking my coffee to my recliner, which is in front of my west-facing living room window. This is a nice place to have my coffee and quiet time. My bird feeder is outside this window, so it's "somewhat" like being outside. 

Nothing really replaces the cool morning breeze and the sounds of nature waking up, though. For that, I have to actually go outside.

This morning, I woke up about 7:30, and managed to get myself up out of bed within a few minutes. I took my medications and fixed my coffee, then outside I went! By the time I opened the backdoor, about 8:10, the sun had topped the trees, at least from my perspective on the back porch. Seven steps down to the patio, however, and the sun was still behind the trees a bit. 

I sat down, after I reopened the patio umbrella. We've been having lots of thunderstorms with high winds in the past few weeks, so I have just left the umbrella closed to protect it.

I was only able to sit out there for 15 minutes or so, because even though it was still a cool 65 degrees out, the sun was blaring down on my patio too much for me.

One thing I got from this morning that I felt was worth sharing was that of perspective. If I had judged whether or not I could have my coffee and prayer time on the patio based on the conditions on the porch, I would have turned around and gone back inside. But five feet can make a difference. Once I was on the lower ground of the patio, it was still shady from the trees behind my house. 

It may seem silly, but I was so glad to have a short time on the patio. It was like a preview of the cooler weather that is to come. I am looking forward to the cool mornings that come with later sunrises. Fall and winter are my favorites for this reason. I love the mornings that I need a sweater to sit out there.

From this morning's reading:

"The Lord sustains all who fall and raises up all who are bowed down. The eyes of all look to You, and You give them their food in due time. You open Your hand and satisfy the desire of every living thing." Psalm 145:14-16.

Be blessed my friends! 

God is Working on Your Problem

Recently, my daughter and I were talking about my granddaughter, who broke both bones in her leg about mid-shin in late March. It was her first--and last--soccer game of the season. She's still in a cast, although she did finally get a below the knee cast about 3 or 4 weeks ago. We were saying how it had been so long now, almost 4 months, and it seemed like it would always be that way. We can't see any change with our physical eyes.

Of course, we know due to x-rays taken at her most recent doctor appointment that the bones are healing well. We are hopeful that she'll get a walking cast soon. I hope so. She's so tired of crutches, and at times a wheelchair. Not being able to participate in summer activities is getting really old. It's a bummer for anyone, but especially for a 12-year-old girl.

God used this little conversation to remind me that we often doubt He is doing anything about what we pray for. After all, we don't see any changes, so He must have put our request in the file cabinet to revisit later, if at all, right?

Wrong! God is working behind the scenes. In Isaiah 55:8-9 He says:

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, 

Nor are your ways My ways," declares the Lord. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, 

So are My ways higher than your ways, 

And My thoughts than your thoughts." 

He doesn't act like we humans do, procrastinating or setting our needs aside. He has a plan for each of our lives. And He hears our prayers. A couple of places this is evident are in the Psalms:

"O Lord my God, I cried to You for help, and You healed me." Psalm 30:2 

"Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all." Psalm 34:19

Also, in Philippians we are encouraged to pray and trust God:

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4: 6-7. 

I don't know if anyone else needed this reminder, but I sure did! It's been a long process for my granddaughter. I've also had some other pressing concerns and seemingly unanswered prayers that have made me question why He has delayed in answering. 

I've actually been kind of down. Not exactly depressed, but not joyful either.

So I decided to put this out there, just in case someone else needed to be reminded that God is at work on your problem! 

We're only human, and we get discouraged. But take heart! As Jesus said: 

"In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world." John 16:33 

Not a Blackout Curtain

My bedroom faces east, and because of this I have blackout curtains so I can sleep past the crack of dawn. Now that I'm retired, I'm blessed that on most days I can allow my body's natural circadian rhythm to decide when I go to bed and when I wake up. Today, sunrise was officially 7:01 am, but of course it starts to get light out way before the sun is actually up. 

I woke up shortly before 8 am this morning, and I noticed that sunlight was peeking out of a couple of places where I didn't get the curtains completely closed last night. Light was also streaming out all around the edges, like sunlight was trying to sneak in any way it could.

Sunlight was breaking through the barrier I had hung to try and keep it out. My curtains looked like they were "bursting at the seams," letting the overpowering sunlight through against their best efforts to stop it. They could not hold back the light completely.

It made me think of how we who are Christians have the light of Jesus within us. The Bible says, "we have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure." (2 Corinthians 4:7, NLT).

Sometimes His light, also known as His love, shines through us to others. It might be as simple as a smile to someone. Or maybe we have a song bubbling up in us and we start singing or humming a tune. Other times it might be shown in another way, such as feeling led to give a stranger in front of you at the store a twenty-dollar bill when it becomes apparent that they are short on the amount needed to make the purchase they were attempting to make.

A smile or a song doesn't cost us anything, but it might make someone's day.  Giving to someone in need could help restore that person's faith. We have no idea what the people we encounter are going through. 

I don't mean to come across "preachy." I was convicted by the Holy Spirit this morning and I wrote about it in my journal. I even snapped a picture to remind myself that I need to let God's light shine through me more often. I couldn't quit thinking about it, so I decided to share it.

Blackout curtains are a wonderful invention for those of us who are night owls with an east-facing bedroom window. But we have the light of Christ within us! I for one feel like I don't let it out nearly often as I need to. I'm not a blackout curtain, and I need to stop acting like one.

"Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven." Matthew 5:16 NASB

What I've Been Up To

So, here's what I've been up to...

Retirement is wonderful. For the past 8 months since I left my job and stepped into the unknown world as a retiree in a new town, I have slept in a lot, read, watched TV and movies, and spent a lot of time with my family that I moved here to be close to. 

At first, after I was unpacked and settled in, I just wandered through my duplex trying to figure out what I needed to do. 

Suddenly, for the first time in many years, I felt like I didn't have a purpose. That whole post last week was about how I am a writer and need to allow myself to do that. I will do more of that, but that's only one facet of my new life.

I have so many things I want to do, and now I finally have time to do them. However, at times it's so overwhelming! What to choose? 

I have my self-imposed "family historian" duties, which I have taken on myself to do because I love working on that. I'm revising photo albums with journaling on the pages to describe who are in the pictures and what the event was. Also, I'm scanning older printed pictures into digital storage for back up.

There are the collector souvenir spoons I have been collecting since 1974. The collection is getting large and I'm looking at new ways to display them. So, there's that project.

Of course, there are always books to read. I have been reading a lot more, although it's usually only an hour before bed at night. I don't sit and read all day, though I guess I could some days if I wanted to. I have fallen in love with books again after many years of not reading very much. I'm using the public library here, visiting every other week to take back and check out more books. It's a wonderful place, and big enough to get lost in. I love it.

Perhaps one of the most important things I've been doing is paying better attention to my health. I've started walking at a local park that has an excellent system of trails. I walked three days this past week. My legs ached at night, but I was pleased that I had finally been motivated enough to get some exercise.

So, this is not an earth-shattering type of post; just a little note to let my readers know that first, I really to intend to write more and second, life is good in my little neck of the woods where I now live. I'm adapting.

I'll leave this little bit of encouragement from Philippians:

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7 NASB

Until next time, be blessed my friends. Love y'all! 💓

In the last bit of 2021...

We are in the last 2 hours of 2021 as I write this. Until a few minutes ago, I have been sitting alone in my living room and binge-watching the first season of Lost in Space (the new version...though I'm old enough to remember the version that was on TV in the 60s). This version is pretty good. I had watched season 1 and then never got around to watching season 2. Now, there's a season 3 and I didn't remember what happened in season 1. So I started over.

It is worth mentioning that God has done an amazing work in my heart, because I actually prefer being alone tonight watching Netflix. In not too distant years past, FOMO (fear of missing out) would have pulled me out of the house to some event. I so desperately needed to belong for so many years. Now, however, I'm content and happy to be alone on New Year's Eve.

This year that is drawing to a close, 2021, brought a lot of changes to my life. At times I look around and marvel at what God has done in my life.

January through June, I finished out my contract in the office of the school where I had worked since 1995. It still blows my mind that I no longer work there.

That portion of the year flew by, and I found myself among the ranks of the retired on July 1. I sold my house, packed up, and moved to a town that is a 3-and-a-half-hour drive away from my beloved hometown; the only place I had ever lived. I miss it, but I at the same time I am loving retirement and having my family so close by. 

It has been an adjustment, but a good one. In mid-September, I found a duplex in a good neighborhood. I really like it here. I do miss my friends from my hometown, but the trade-off is I get to see my grandkids often; at least once a week. 

There are some things I don't like. I was used to living in a small town which was next door to a bigger town. There were lots of different stores, restaurants, and really great medical care. 

Here, we are in a smaller town in the middle of nowhere:

There is no drive through Starbucks! 

The variety of restaurants and retail stores is very limited.

And I still haven't found a doctor who will take on a new patient, which means that in a couple of weeks, in order to get my prescriptions refilled for the next 6 months, I have to go back to my physician in the larger city that I lived close to previously. 

I tell myself, though, that these are first-world problems. I will survive. I don't need to eat out or shop much anyway, and I found a drive though (though non-Starbucks) coffee place.

When it's all said and done, I would do it all again. I am in the same town with my daughter and her family for the first time. Having family across town is amazing. 

My youngest son and his wife visited me for Christmas, and while we were having dinner at my daughter's house, we zoom called my oldest son. So I was talking to all my children that day. 

This year has had its challenges, but it has had good things too. 

I noticed this entry in my journal, and I want to share it.

"Your lovingkindness, O Lord, extends to the heavens, Your faithfulness reaches to the skies...the children of men take refuge in the shadow of Your wings. They drink their fill of the abundance of Your house; and You give them to drink of the river of your delights."  --Psalm 36--

Bottom line: God takes care of us wherever we are. He is good and faithful, and I feel really blessed.

Happy New Year to all my friends and family! May 2022 be a good year filled with Hope and Promise for you all! 

Meanwhile, in a Nearby Small Town...

Well, ok, it's not so nearby to most of my friends and family, but I have been busy in the town I moved to in August.

I have once again been too busy to write. In mid-September I found a duplex for rent and my contract started on Sept 15, the birthday of my firstborn child. I spent the last half of September moving in, and have been getting settled in my new place since then. I decided to rent for a while because the housing market is crazy right now. Everything is sky-high expensive. I will possibly look into buying in a year...or maybe I'll just continue to rent. It's kind of nice to not have to worry about the expenses that come with being a homeowner, and the rent is decent.

I've kind of fallen into the rabbit hole of YouTube videos; specifically those about minimalism, rental renos, and decorating. I pulled myself away to write because lately I've been feeling like I am supposed to. Actually, I've felt like I'm supposed to write a book, maybe more than one, for a while now. So I'm exercising the typing muscles and writing in my blog. 

All the YouTube videos have made me feel inadequate to some degree, but my gift is writing, not public speaking. I don't think I could ever feel comfortable doing a "vlog," as they call the video version of blogging. It's just not me.

But will anyone continue to read my blogs? In today's world, no one seems to have time to read; everyone wants to watch or listen. Several people I know listen to podcasts every day for their daily Bible reading and for devotionals.

Maybe that's why I need to pursue the book-writing. 

Call me old-fashioned; I still like the written word. I have read 21+ books (that's an estimate; I've actually lost count) in 2021; most of those since I retired in June. I have really enjoyed having time to read, but I don't read more than about an hour a day because I have so many other things I want to do.

That's really all I have for the moment. If you read this, consider commenting either on the blog post or Facebook or Twitter. Would you continue to read a blog, or have you become more accustomed to listening instead of reading?

I'd be interested to know if I still have any followers. 

This scripture has stuck with me for days now; it causes me to think about my sphere of influence, and how can fulfill the plans God has for me? He has put a fire into my heart to write. Maybe that's what I'm supposed to do, either with more regular blogging (MUCH more regular blogging), and eventually, books?

"Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it with an attitude of thanksgiving; praying at the same time for us as well, that God will open up to us a door for the word, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ..."  Colossians 4:2,3 NASB

New Chapter

It's been a while since I have written in this blog. There's been a LOT going on.

For starters, I'll sum up (too much to 'splain just yet):

June 18: On the day after my last official work day (I had vacation days to use up), I sold my house.

June 30: I officially retired from the school where I had worked since 1995.

August 3: I closed on the house I had bought in 2009 and that same day, drove 3 1/2 hours to where my daughter and her family lives.

Yep, a lot has happened in a short amount of time. Welcome to the new chapter of my life. Now, let me explain what's been going on.

Several years ago, when I first started thinking about retirement, I started entertaining the thought of moving to where my family lives. Those who know me know that I could have not been persuaded to leave my hometown, the only place I have lived for the 66.5 years of my life so far, unless God directed me to. I liked my little house and my little town. I had close friends at church and at work. I was content.

Until I wasn't. About 2 years ago, I really started to feel isolated from family and friends. Several good friends had retired or became involved in their own families to a greater extent so that I seldom saw them. Completely understandable, but those are the facts. Also, I only saw my kids about once a year, and 2-3 times a year I traveled to the town where I am now living to see my grandkids.

Then Covid came along, and all that came to an abrupt halt. There was no more seeing anyone, anytime. I was working from home, where I lived alone. I didn't see my friends, my co-workers, my church family, or my children and grandchildren. The only social interaction I had was on zoom and Facetime calls.

I don't have to tell you, though; you all lived it with me. Our society has changed drastically in the past year and a half.

My daughter had been suggesting that I moved to their town when I retired. I had been hesitant, but still open to the suggestion for SOMEDAY. Not right away, though. That is, until the 4 1/2 months of working from home and isolation I endured from mid-March through the first week of August in 2020.

I'm not outgoing; I'm actually quite the introvert, and I do fine by myself with some social interaction every so often. I didn't do so well with 4+ months of it, though.

I started to feel like I was on an island, and there were no boats venturing close to it. I went days without uttering a sound because there was no one anywhere near me.

My beloved 15-year-old cat, Izzy, had crossed the rainbow bridge in December 2020, so I didn't even have her to talk to.

The idea of moving started to sound plausible. 

About a year ago, I started considering putting my house up for sale in the spring of 2021. I prayed about it a lot, and somewhere along the way a number--a sale price for my house--came to me. I pushed it aside because I knew nothing about selling a house and what to ask for it.

But the number stayed there. I began to realize that it was God putting that number in my head. I felt He was telling me that this was the price I would get for it.

I consulted a friend at church who is a realtor, and she told me what I should ask for my house if I wanted to sell it on my own. This price was a little more than the number I had been thinking of, but it's what I decided to start with. The plan was to try and sell it for a few weeks, then list it with her if it didn't sell.

By the middle of June, the people who had been interested in my house all backed away. No one even countered my asking price. I decided that meant I was supposed to list it, so I made an appointment for June 18, my first day of vacation, to meet with my realtor and list my house.

Meanwhile...(this is where it gets good)...    

I needed to train my replacement at my job, but we had difficulty getting together. I finally got to work with her for 2 hours on my last day on the job, at the end of the day. I now know that this was exactly how God set it up.

The peace of God enveloped me when I met her; I knew she was who God wanted to have my job. He had given it to me years before in a strange turn of events and I had loved my job. It was the job I was meant to do. Now I knew He had done the same for her.

I had paperwork to turn in to the administration office, but they were closed by the time we were finished that day, so I went to turn in the paperwork the next morning, on the first day of my vacation, June 18. Because I had to go to the office to turn this in, I saw and talked to someone I didn't see often. As it turns out, this is who bought my house. 

I had been feeling a little irritated that the events of that week had not lined up like I had planned. But God...HE had a plan.

The price? There was an offer, and I countered. Then the buyer countered the number that had been in my head for almost a year. 

I started crying because I knew God was working to sell my house.

GOD sold my house. I had nothing to do with it. 

I still don't have a house of my own; housing is hard to find right now. But I have my daughter and son-in-law's basement apartment to live in until I find a place. My needs are met. God had it all worked out.

So begins my new chapter, in a new town. God is in control, He has shown me that repeatedly. 

By the way, this is the scripture that came to me when I woke up this morning:

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

Scaredy Cat

My cat Isabel is a "scaredy cat."  She has severe anxiety, which I think was brought on in part by living across the street from the football field when she was very little. The year I adopted her was also the year that our football team decided firing a cannon was a good thing to do when we scored a touchdown.

Izzy wasn't a fan.

She is still afraid of loud noises; things like thunder, large trucks driving down the street, and dogs barking will send her scrambling to get under the bed. A few mornings ago, she was sitting in my lap purring until the dog two houses down decided to start barking.

First, the purring stopped. Then, she started the characteristic fidgeting like she does when she's nervous about something. I knew the next step would be that she would get up and go to her hiding place under the bed.

I reminded her that the dog was outside and she was inside the house where he couldn't get to her. She of course did not listen to me and soon got up and left as I figured she would.

I shook my head and muttered something along the lines of "why won't you believe me that you're safe?" Then it hit me.

We do the same thing.

God tells us in His word to not fear, but we still do. I have battled with anxiety my entire life. I am so much better, but I have weak moments sometimes.

Some nights I lie down in bed, get comfortable and start to drift off to sleep, and then I hear something. Many times I have gotten up out of bed, checked every room, and of course all is ok.

This is when I get into the Word and read the places I where I have found peace. Places in His word like in Psalms calm my heart and help me remember to trust Him:

"I lay down and slept;

I awoke, for the Lord sustains me.

I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people

who have set themselves against me round about."  Psalm 3:5,6.

These days, the environment of society in a pandemic lends itself to being fearful.

Sometimes I have to shut off the news and just believe God is taking care of me. I'm doing all I can do; I'm mostly staying home and wearing a mask when I have to go out. I do grocery pick up for the most part but if I absolutely have to go into a store, I do it early in the morning before it's packed.

Then, I have to Just. Trust. God.

There's a reassuring passage in Isaiah:

"Do not fear, for I am with you;

Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you, surely I will help you,

Surely I will  uphold you with My righteous right hand."  Isaiah 41:10.

God is watching over me, I know He is. I have to be reminded of it from time to time, though; we all do if we're honest. I'm posting this because I DID need to be reminded, and chances are someone else did, too.

We are going to get through this by trusting in God, by taking Him at His word. There is a Bible full of promises of how He protects His children. We have to read and believe Him. He is our only hope. As the song says, "all my life You have been faithful, all my life You have been so so good..."

I choose to trust in the goodness of God.  Please join me in trusting Him.

Stay as safe as you can and leave this burden of fear in His hands. He is watching over His own. <3

Rescued Unharmed

Wow, May 5th. That was the last time I wrote. Time gets away these days. One day fades into another, and before you know it, it's been a month. Or two.

Here it is the third week of June, and The Virus still rages on. Working from home is the new norm for me. I'm so very thankful I have a job and I can work from home, but it just feels so....abnormal. Weird. Way out of the highly acclaimed comfort zone.

I still have not been back to church services, even though my church is meeting in two services to spread people out. For starters, to me it doesn't seem to be any better to be around people than it was at the start of this. Plus, I can't hug anyone. I can't sit with anyone (unless they want to take a chance on me not being infected, or I want to take a chance on them). I don't really see the point. I'm better off watching from home, which I do, faithfully.

I don't mean to sound cynical, but those are the facts as I see them. I'm certainly not suggesting that people shouldn't go church or do things out in society. I know some people really need to be with other people. We have the freedom to do as we see fit, and that's cool.

I've been staying busy, which is good I'm told. I work from home every weekday. I go into the office a couple of days a week for 3 or 4 hours at a time to print work I've done and saved, and to get documents signed to send to the administration office. I pick up more work that has accumulated to  home to work on.

Then I come back home.

When I'm not working, I read, or watch a movie, or binge-watch TV shows on Netflix, or sometimes go for a walk. I need to go for more walks, but the motivation has not been there lately.

I have cleaned out all the closets and have a huge collection of stuff to donate to charity.

Oh, and a very important new activity: I do a weekly grocery pick up. I order my groceries online and go to the grocery pick up area, where the store associates come out and put the groceries in my trunk. Where has this been all my life?

Simple pleasures. It's the little things, isn't it?

I'm not depressed, but as a person who was depressed most of my life until a few years ago, I know the signs very well. I could fall back into it if I don't fight it.

Today I'm fighting it. Some days I don't feel like fighting it, but I still do. Maybe not as hard as on good days, but I still fight. Because I remember sitting in the dark room staring at...nothing. I remember the complete hopelessness. I remember the loneliness. I remember feeling like no one cared about me at all. I remember feeling like I was in a deep pit and there was no ladder or stairs that I could find.

I'm fighting it because I know that this is all an illusion.

All is NOT lost; it is NOT hopeless, and there are people in my life who love me.

The most important person who loves me is JESUS. He died for me (and for you!) so that we could spend eternity with Him. He loves us with an everlasting love, and His mercies are new every morning.

That's great news! Sometimes in the fight I lose sight of the prize, as it says in Philippians 3:13-- "I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

So I go to Him every morning when I wake up and fall at His feet. I thank Him for keeping me alive yet another night and giving me another day to live. I tell Him all that is on my heart, and pray for a list of prayer requests that I bring to Him every day.

As long as He keeps waking me up every morning, I still have a mission on this earth. I still have a purpose, and I am still walking out His plan for my life. I may not be able to see into the future or know what He has planned for me from one day to the next, but HE knows, and that is all I need. HE has my name inscribed on the palm of His hand, as it says in Isaiah 49:16--

"Behold, I have inscribed you on the palms of My hands; Your walls are continually before Me."

He also says in Psalm 55: 17-18--

"Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and He hears my voice.

He rescues me unharmed from the battle waged against me, even though many oppose me."

He rescues me unharmed. Yes, there is a real battle going on in the spirit realm. The enemy of my soul would like to pull me into depression again, and render me useless for the Kingdom of God. But GOD is on my side and He is not going to let me lose.

I think it might be time to start on that book I'm planning to write.

Be blessed my friends. Thanks for reading my rant!